Upriver like the Salmon (to Mt Hood)

Hello, intrepid readers. I notice from the blog stats that "views" are down. 😒 my publisher insists on my getting those numbers up. I promise to "sex this up." !!

Today began w a gourmet breakfast. The place was Gracie's in southwest Portland.

 

This is Michael's German pancake, with which Amy may be familiar. He rolled it w lemon & powdered sugar. It was good.

My bread pudding French toast was mundane by comparison. It was also a disappointment. Karen had the even more mundane eggs Benedict, which were excellent. Barb was having a crappy day & just had a croissant.

We ate there to be near the International Rose Test a Gardens. Started during WWI in case England was bombed out of roses, it's 5 acres of scenic & nasal beauty.  It was reported by one of the keepers that we were there at the best time - every variety was in bloom! Having been in Regent's Park in London in prime time, I can say this is the best rose garden I've ever seen. I insert just one pictorial example:

Then it was east towards Mt. Hood, which, unlike Mt. Rainier, seems to stand still just fine. 

Due to a fortunate event, I found the National Geographic webpage for "Road to Mt. Hood."  This turned out to be wonderful, as NG's directions took us not only along the path of the early settlers, but to various other wonders, too.  There are too many pictures -- here's a weblink to an album of all of them I shot or collected (clearly, I could not take them all): https://picasaweb.google.com/105397618648885302074/Day5Extras?authkey=Gv1sRgCO6gqMb92e2RXg&noredirect=1

The first big highlight was the Columbia River Gorge.  It is gorgeous, pun intended.  Here's my shot of it east from the highest point on the Historic Columbia River Highway (HCRH) --

The HCRH includes multiple waterfalls.  I convinced the car (I was driving so convincing was easy) not to stop at ALL of them, as we wanted to make Mt. Hood sometime in the light.  The tallest and most spectacular is at Multnomah.  The falls here are 569 feet -- Niagara (acc to a quick Google search) is by comparison 167.

From Multnomah Falls, NG sent us to Bonneville Dam.  See link for pics.  The thrilling thing there was the fish hatchery.  The thing is -- they are all swimming upstream, dying (pun intended) to spawn.  Including a few salmon.  There is video.  Outside from the roof you could look down into the locks and see them jump up the levels -- it was amazing, beautiful and something you may never see again.  Michael's quip was "all that just to get laid."  All that?!?!?!

The next stop was Mt. Hood winery.  Karen was the only taster in a quick stop, purchasing a single bottle of Oregon Grenache.  Their wine was pretty good AND the view of Hood, and an unknown snow-covered mountain to the north (Mt. Defiance, OR?) were amazing.

As you can see from the link, we had many shots of Hood.  It is amazing you can get so close and see so much, much on quality four lane highway.  NG again steered us perfectly -- putting us on Trillium Lake with this money shot:

It was 55 & the water was actually pretty warm.  There was a bald eagle circling overhead.

Then the five hour trek across state, with Michael doing a superb job at the wheel in the dark through the windy valleys of central Oregon.  It was a late night.  And the B&B Karen chose for the night immediately failed the Steve test -- it has no heat!

The Barb of the day takes setup.  It starts with my daughter saying she thinks she's being "trolled" about my having gotten a tatoo (it appears in some of the photos).  Which led to us having to see Urban Dictionary for a definition, which I read aloud:  "Anyone who fails to recognize a troll and responds to it with anger or annoyance is said to have been "trolled". Being trolled often results in large quantities of butthurt." To which Barb, who was having gastric issues, said "My butt hurts."  We laughed, in part in sympathy. 

Wednesday is coastal day to the Redwood forest.  Wish us good weather and safe winding.  

Sightseeing interruptus

Hello, courageous readers.

One of the caveat's of this trip was "we aren't going to plan too much; we'll go where we decide we want to go and go there."

Today was one of those days.  We wanted to go to Mt. Rainier (first picture) and we did.  

Let's start with getting lost at least once on the way out of Vancouver.  Hey, everyone needs to see the Air Canada freight hanger at the airport once in their lifetime!  

Then there was the line of traffic back from the Fraser River Tunnel.  They turned the closed lane to green as we passed.  Like "Michael, you aren't supposed to move through here quickly."

Today's visit to the border guard, which was supposed to take 38 minutes (according to the sign), took 27.  Michael's answer to "where are you from" was "Pennsylvania" and to "why were you in Canada?" "vacation" and the guard said "have a nice trip." :)

Then all the time to Mt. Rainier.  For those who don't know, even though sometimes Rainier seems to dominate the Seattle skyline, it is not close by, at least in driving time.

One story we heard was about Rainier, which a local Native tribe called "the walking mountain."  According to one of these myths, Rainier is the mother of mountains & Mt. Baker (150 miles farther north) is the father; mom has left dad to "walk" -- leaving seven smaller mountains (children) with Dad.  Michael particularly likes this story because Rainier seems to loom over the landscape, but it seems to disappear frequently.  Part of that is angles -- behind a hill, behind a tree -- and then there are the 275 days a year of clouds.  The fact we had trouble today finding the mountain just fit with its indigenous myth. 

 Leaving Rainier, heading south toward Portland, we had this view:

This shot answers the question "what IS a waterfall" as I insisted (charmingly, I'm sure) that what we saw running down the mountains was not "waterfall" but runoff.  I was asked for a definition and made one up.    Then I saw this and said "THAT's a real waterfall."  All agreed.

We decided to go from Rainier to Mt. St. Helen's.  This is not an easy trip (when it says "next gas 54 miles" on the middle of a mountain, you pay attention) and we wound our way to the base of St. Helen's park, where we found a sign like this: 

We didn't believe it.  So, we drove up 22 miles to find two gates stopping us from going farther.  Stubborn jerks.

Then we decided to head south to Mt. Hood.  We weren't five miles before confronting another orange sign saying the road was closed.

It was then I coined the title term.  Sigh.

We had already cancelled our reservations at the highly recommended Peruvian restaurant in Portland.

A long day on the road, with some disappointments, but we really enjoyed the majestic natural scenery of the Cascades -- huge pine trees, snow in June, huge mountains, "run off" everywhere.

And then there was the fun (I have been told I undersold yesterday's fun).

Here are the witty highlights:

Today's "Barb", to end a discussion on whether or not to eat mayonnaise, "it's bland; it's merely a lubricant to make your food go down."  Wow.

To which, Michael added "said the archbishop to the actress." :)

Although the actress-archbishop line has been much used in our first four days plus, this one struck us all as very funny, and very apropos.  Props to Michael.

My day was made by my daughter, on learning I had gotten a tattoo, telling her mother she had to get one because "my father can't be cooler than I am."  Her mother, as a good mother should, assured her that there was "no way your father is cooler than you."  Since this conversation took place in the car, we all heard it and got great humor out of it.  No one has ever (accurately) accused me of being cool AND whose daughter ever has?!?!?!!?

And, for a final bon mot, the sign in the bar and grill in Packwood where we had lunner (lunch + dinner), which reminds us all of the 2nd thing to go:

Who Said Border Guards Aren't Loads of Fun? (Day 3)

Sometimes, you know no matter what you say, you can't top something.  In this case, no matter what I write today will not compare with the news from our friend Mark (& Suzie) that they have their first grandchild!  Congratulations.

May the bluebird of happiness always be with him.

Morning "Barb" as Michael drove away from three of us standing, reaching for the car in the parking lot: "Paleface need to find shade."

WTF did he mean? At one point Michael said to me, "I want you to know I'm not really playing with you."  Geez, we have 8 more days in the car together!

Today was "Vancouver day."  After breakfast in downtown Seattle (ordinary enough breakfast fare of eggs benedict, corned beef hash, biscuits and gravy) we made the 2-3 hour trip across the border to Vancouver.

2-3 hours is a loose number because part of the trick is getting across the border.  The sign said "15 minute wait" and we pulled up.  It took us 23 minutes, because Michael has a gift for picking the wrong line.

& the guard at the turnstile was...let us say "fastidious" since we have to get back across the border tomorrow.  "Where are you from?"  Michael, having handed them 4 US passports, goes with "the States."  Then, errr..."Pennsylvania"...then "errr...we're from western Pennsylvania and they are from further east..."  OMG!

Then he asks "why are you coming into Canada?"  I think Michael worked the word "vacation" in somewhere in the 3rd sentence...:)

Then, "you have a place to stay in Vancouver?"  This should have been simple "Yes.  X hotel."  Well, Michael twists this into to about 4 sentences and another question.

"Do you have any weapons?"  Michael almost yells "no" but at least he gets it out quickly.  Finally, the guard says "have a nice day"  and he drove us into Canada.

Will we ever get out?

Vancouver is a lovely city.  I will not attempt anything new here (despite having heard the lecture on words and ideas from last night's movie, Words and Pictures) but say that it is an interesting mix of high rises -- not big ones like NYC, but still a lot of them -- many of which seem to be living units and natural beauty.  There's also a lot of water, more like Seattle, even wetter.  We are in the main part of the city, within two blocks of a bridge to the south, and the bridge across to the north is only about 20 blocks away.

The other characteristic is the mountains -- they really come down close to the water on several sides, making you feel enclosed.  And those mountains have snow visible on them, in case you were feeling summer warmth (it was 70 F in town today).  There are mountains near Seattle, but they don't push down to the water like this; it reminds me somewhat of Zihuatanejo, with evergreens and grass.

Clearly our highlight here today (for sightseeing purposes) was Stanley Park.  As a fan of things Native, I found this exhibit in the park truly impressive:

We suspect it's the largest exhibit of totems anywhere.  One website says it's the number one tourist attraction here (making this cliche tourist photo #3 in a row), and rightly so.  But I'm not sure that's well known.

We also visited the Sun Yat-Sen Chinese Garden.  Saw three turtles, one frog, one koi, one heron.  Failed to meditate appropriately.  Who knew?

Now, for dinner.  The best meal so far, as all agreed.  Friday night's "phenomenal" was true of tonight.  The place was the Blue Water, which one site said is the best seafood restaurant in Vancouver.  Not sure if that's true (tough life if you got to try the competitors to find out), but it's got to be right up there.  Tonight's special was halibut (pictured) which were told came off the boat about an hour and a half  before we ate it.  The chimi sauce was great & the ratatouille was excellent.  Go there if you are in Vancouver.  (here's my pic after having taken a bite -- as there was no lunch we were all starving).

There was no movie tonight.  Fatigue has set in some and we have a big day, with the longest driving journey (here to Portland) with a stop at Rainier (if it stands still long enough for us to visit it) on the way & predictions of some rain.  I hear it rains in the northwest, though this isn't the season.  Knock wood (for Beth) we've seen none in four days.

Apologies for the lack of comic relief here -- I hear even the big guy took an off day on Sunday.  Just imagine if I'd tried to use this proffered tag line: "there's a scout badge for that" (seen on a sign for the Canadian Boy Scouts as we entered Canada).  I'm sure there's comic potential, but...eh.
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Walk a (Yelp) Mile in Dorothy's (Lamour's) Shoes (Day 2)

Today's "Barb" (for Allan): "You know, the hearing is the third thing to go."

Advice from the pourer at a winery, echoed immediately by the not-yet-intoxicated woman next to us: "Don't dilute the alcohol!"

Today's likely recurring line: "That's just a mile, we can walk it." (explanation later)

To begin: Karen selected the current hotel, where we are staying for two nights.  Karen is doing penance for this choice.  If it is a 4-star hotel, it is on a 9-star scale.  It fails the "Steve test" for hotels in these ways: plastic glasses in room; small towels; thin towels; smelly room; small bed (it can't really be a queen).  And, to confound us all, they actually have keys.  Yes! a metal thing that goes in a lock!!!  Yikes!

Their continental breakfast this morning was exquisite.  Karen ate elsewhere. :)

Kitsch photo du jour:

I do not know why the town of Georgetown has a giant cowboy hat and boots in their public park.  I am sure I don't want to know.  Let the myth making beginning.

The day was spent with the requisite trip to the top of the Space Thingy. For those of you who have missed it, there's an ad campaign, seen first at the airport, that runs: "Save your money for the Space Thingy and take the light rail into town."

Here's the cliche photo du jour:

The football and baseball stadiums are out there, center right.  Mt. Rainier, however, hasn't bothered to show up for the picture -- too damned early, Michael says.

After a quick stop at the tattoo artist, Karen chickened out on getting matching tattoos, and lunch, off we went to the north-northwest to Woodlinville and some wineries.

We hit Columbia, the oldest in the area, first.  The architecture was beautiful in their new facility, and Barb bought a bottle of Gerwurstraminer, but it the service was poor and the rest of the wine just so-so.

Across the street at Chateau Ste. Michelle, there was a huge throng.  Again, service was iffy.  They had a whole Riesling flight, which Michael & Barb tasted.  The 2013 Cross Creek was approved by all & went to dinner.

Then, Karen having made a friend who sent us to Brian Carter, which was too full, then to Novelty, where Barb bought two more bottles.  Karen was judicious & bought no wine before its time.

Dinner was at Miller's Guild,  a chop house.  Picture of said "chop" on grill:

Dessert was lemon chess pie. The highlight, IMHO.  If you've never had chess pie -- we'd never seen it on a restaurant menu -- it's pretty much flavor (sometimes chocolate), butter, eggs, and sugar.  Enter visual:

After dinner we decided, being in a city with a film selection, we'd see Words with Pictures.  Yelp said it was 1.0 miles from the restaurant.  Discussion of walking.  Nature of hills.  Midnight when getting out.  Etc.  Determined we had a car for a reason.  Wise move. :)  After missing the tricky ramp to get across a viaduct, we drove what seemed to be 10 miles to arrive.  "Glad we didn't walk" was heard  repeatedly.  And "glad we didn't walk." And, of course, "that was just a mile." [ironically, OC] :) There was a line to get in.  !!!  Turns out they were there to see Palestine Stereo.  I bought two tickets for that just to be with the in crowd.

We agreed the movie was around the B- review Michael had read, with a certain trite quality.  And a brief discussion of Clive Owen being dishy.

Today's highlight may be listening and singing to "Road to Morocco."  Attempt to copy link to it...enjoy -- we are looking forward to meeting Dorothy Lamour.  Road to Morocco

Post-dinner Brief: How to Ruin a Pair of Underwear

I was told this story was too good NOT to tell.

We went to dinner at this local Mexican place -- I could recreate the discussion of "phenomenal" versus "good" versus "pretty good" (everyone agreed it was NOT phenomenal) -- maybe six blocks from the hotel.

I was driving.  Due to an unfortunate series of events (i.e. I'm muddleheaded) we had to return to last night's hotel, 10 miles away, to retrieve the only blazer I brought for the 11 day trip (rumor has it some restaurants at which we have reservations demand such a thing -- honestly!).

So, I'm fighting my way through I-5 traffic & I can't get the turn signal to turn off on the rental car as I change lanes when the local sheriff pulls up next to me, makes some hand motions, then pulls me over -- lights and all.  See title.

He comes up on the passenger side and Michael can't figure out how to get the window down & all he said is "turn on your headlights."  Michael says it's a rental and he says "I get that, just turn them on."  What do you say?

Nice of him not to find some reason to at least ticket me.

Lovin' Seattle.

Wild times in Seattle (Day 1)

Good evening, courageous readers.  Today's title comes from the fact today we left the city via ferry (I get motion sick at the word marine) & visited Blake Island State Park -- called "pristine" by our guide.  Close enough, I guess.

Day 1 is not over -- there's Mexican food on the dinner menu -- but it's enough of a day and there are enough pictures to more than fill this blog.

The line of the day is from Barb: "If you are any kind of specialist, Michael, it's in crapology."  Even Michael, who had just finished indicating his expertise in marine biology, having already rendered expertise on geography, geology, meteorology, and mixology in 12 hours, admitted this was both accurate and funny.

Now, the shot of the day:

Those of you familiar with the area will know this is Mt. Rainier.  It is fairly ubiquitous in Seattle, IF it's "clear."  It's clear here about 90 days a year (acc to today's guide). As you can see, today was a VERY good Rainier day.  It's impressive.  Amazing.  Yes, I know this is cliche, but as we English professors tell our comp students -- there's reason things are cliches. :)

Food du jour: 

The time we didn't spend on the way to the Native site on Blake Island (whence the pic of Rainier comes) we spent in Pike Place Market.  I might like pasta.  We sent 4 lbs home.  In the upper right, that dark stuff is dark chocolate linguini!  NS!  What a thing.

Hey, trivia: did you know there's a Starbucks like on every corner here?  Who knew?

Yes, we took an hour ferry ride to Blake Island, where they dress in traditional local Native garb, did a Native performance, showed us some totems and explained them, and generally reminded us that we are not that far away from not having a Starbucks on every corner. :)  Oh, did a mention the longhouse?  Neat.

Finally, "Ed Norton" was wearing the worst hat. So, we went to Goorin Bros, which we visited in N'Orlins last year.  Ed got a new hat.  He thinks it makes him Frank Sinatra.  Feel free to tell him otherwise.  He's Dr. Crapology.

There will be better hat pics.  Of course, it'll look like shit after he sleeps in it a few nights, but...

And, for those of you who missed the afternoon tweet: 

You can now confirm which of us has Native blood and which of us is the white interloper.  On leaving Blake Island, we compared again and I was darker and he was lighter!  Dr. Crapology tried his degree in dermatology, but none of us believed his explanation. 

I promise less tomorrow.  Unless there's something good, of course.  Bon voyage!

Left Behind

Good morning, courageous readers.

I wasn't going to post again till we were in Seattle, but this was too good.

I am leaving our daughter behind and took her to the grocery store last night.  You need to have this as a reference: she claims to be a foody.  She keeps a log of where she's eaten & what.  And of the recipes she's cooked.  Her Cajun chicken pasta is the bomb!

Here's what she bought:

Gourmet stuff.  The thing that's missing: a can of Beefaroni!  How can she make it twelve days without Beefaroni!  To prepare you, courageous reader, Beefaroni is 4 ****s :)

I hear the weather is cool in Wash state.  Better warm up -- I haven't worn long pants in 6 days. :)

NB:  I have found a hatmaker at Pike Place Market, the same one who made the now famed "Ed Norton" hats from my first blog post pic.  "Ed" forgot to bring his hat; we need to get him another.  Of course, I now know that the "Norton" reference was to Ed Norton in Fight Club, making me Brad Pitt. "I am Fight Club."  Chapeau shot tomorrow!